Pork Rind Porn: Ultimate Food Fetish



Have you ever wanted to see hot naked chicks lying on a bed of pork rinds, or posing nude while eating pork rinds? You can hear what it sounds like when a couple makes love on a bed of pork rinds here & here. I'll bet you haven't even thought of it until now. Well, it's too late now, my friend. The PorkMaster has corrupted your mind. There is no substrata of pornography as sinister and as addictive as pork rind porn. Be forewarned. This stuff will seriously fuck your mind. Below are some reasons why people begged to see this stuff:

Warning: once you click this link you will never be the same


Enter Pork Rind Porn, The ultimate Food Fetish !




 

food fetish

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Reasons mailed in so far:

I don't want your filthy filthy porn!

It is bad enough that's start-up internet ventures frequently charge premium prices for, quite frankly, semi-arousing pornography at best. It is a whole different thing all together to have to gravel at the knees of some pork master at some two-bit, amateur gag site, to check out some hot bods. You make me sick.
On the other hand, who can dismiss the sumptuous, spicy goodness of a well fried pork rind, especially those underneath a well toned and conditioned honey. Lord knows, I have had my share. But still, I find it impossible to beg for my smut!
I hope you can sleep well.
Note from Porkmaster: You don't have to beg, you just have to be funny, motherfucker.

Ease the anti-rind rhetoric

I would like to see women and pork rinds because it may be the best way for me to convince my boyfriend that porkrinds are not horrible. I love porkrinds but he hates them and gets angry when I eat them. However, he loves porno. I thought that if I could get him some porno involving porkrinds he would ease up on all the anti-rind rhetoric and let me eat them in peace. Thanks.


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the "self-love" workout!

I hear that in a cup of man juice there are thousands of calories and I know the act of self-love is quite a workout. I definately need to lose a few calories after eating too many of your delicious pork rinds. So will you please help me get in shape by fueling my excersize with a few nice pictures.

The big lie

I want to see the naked porkring girls because porkrinds are a lot like women. A lot of guys won't admit to eating them, but they all do!!

Useless?

Why do I want to see porn featuring naked women and porkrinds? Because it's there. It's the whole Sex, Drugs and Rock-n-Roll thing that's motivated most people for most of the history of the world...the things we want the most are the things that make us feel good but have little or no other redeeming value. Pork rinds have almost no nutritional value, they are eaten for the sheer hedonistic pleasure of fatty, salty crunchiness. Online porn has no value whatsoever except as jacking material. And so the two are perfect for each other! I seek the pork rind porn like Crusaders sought the Holy Grail.
Note from Porkmaster: If porn is so useless, then why does this guy spend 4 hours a day looking for it? We feel that all people have value, including porno models.

Salty + Saucy = Happiness

Well, I'll tell ya: it's a beer thing. When I have a beer, I want something salty. Pork rinds fill that need. That salty goodness makes me want more beer. More beer makes me want something saucy. So, I get up from the bar and try to get me some saucy goodness. Problem is, I've had too much beer and have prok rind crumbs on my shirt, and nothing saucy wants me. So, if I could just sit at home and drink my beer, and look at salty and saucy together, I'd be a happy man.

Reverence

My reason for the combination is the reverence by which both pork rinds & women can be enjoyed. When you eat a pork rind you KNOW you're eating a pork rind. there is no other texture like a pork rind, no other taste like a pork rind, no other smell like a pork rind, they make your lips greasy, one taste & you want more, no two are exactly alike, where do i stop?? All of the above could be said for women. Matter-of-fact, i think i'm going to go out right now & get some...........

Two Great Tastes...

Pork. Let's face it, the meanings are endless. The word itself makes me laugh! How could you not want to see pork rinds accented with a little porn. For god's sake it's two of the most evil, and best inventions ever. Warms my heart to think that these two are now offered together. better than the combinations of chocolate milk, Reeses peanut butter cups and Laverne and Shirley. Two great tastes in one!

unpleasant side effects

I'll admit it, I don't like pork rinds any more than the next guy, but man do I love naked women. Just as there are many variations of fried pork skins, so too are there many different types of women. You got your hot and spicey, your greasey, your uneven textured. And some come with unpleasant side effects. That's why I never get out of the house, except to acquire more pork or porn

Save My Marriage

I would like to see it because sometimes there are nice girl on and they help save my mariage.

Note from Porkmaster: though we usually don't grant passwords for one liners, this guy from Belgium expressed a simple but powerful point: Porn is a good social force (provided you're not addicted to it) because it allows men to have the fantasy life they need while not actually cheating: "it don't matter where you get your appetite, as long as you eat your dinner at home"

salty wholesome goodness

the reason i think naked chicks and pork rinds go so well together is the salty wholesome nutritious goodness they share. I mean, if you need salt and fatty acids, you eat pork rinds. And if you need some luv'n, a back rub, or in this case something to masturbate to (whilst eating pork rinds?) naked chicks are made for it. And next to pork rinds what's more salty, wholesome, OR nutritious than a naked chick?

and pork rinds look scrumptious.

Food Chain?

The best reason for seeing naked girls eating, lying on, and/or masturbating to with/to porkrinds is that it would be the ultimate picture/experience of the wheel of life/ food chain. The skin is on the pig, the skin comes off the dead pig and is popped like popcors. The new skin goes to the naked lady. When one views a pig with skin intact, one normally does not have a sexual reaction. When said skin is properly conditioned and applied in god's own context, then the appropriate reaction can be achieved. It is one thing to appreciate pork rinds for the flavor, texture and all around experience, it is another thing to take said experience to another level and apply a sexual coonotation to natures perfect food. Therefore, naked chicks with pork rinds are a marriage made in heaven, if not just to take the experience to the previously forbidden level.

Plus, I like naked chicks, I like pork rinds, therefore, naked chicks and prok rinds must be good.